Believe this or not there is no better feeling, than helping someone else achieve something that they originally believed was impossible.
For the last two academic years I have worked with over two hundred year 11 students at various schools in Preston, Lancashire. These students were classed by their head teachers as GCSE C/D borderline.
I live by the mantra that anything is possible. It may sound cheesy and others don’t agree but that’s the secret. I don’t care what other people think. If I allowed what others thought of me to influence the way I tackle my life, I’d never do anything out of pure fear.
Take your self back to when you were 16 (if you are 16 hopefully this will touch base). Whether you’re conscious of it or not you have a major need to feel accepted. You become reluctant of following your own thoughts just in case it differs from the majority. Think of being in a class room. The teacher asks a question. You have an answer but don’t raise your hand because there’s a 50/50 chance you may be wrong. Why? Is it because your mates will take the piss? Does that make you feel stupid? Does that stop you from doing it again? The circle of failure begins because you become frightened of trying. Once bitten, twice shy!
“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. I can accept failure, everyone fails at something, but I can’t accept not trying.” – Michael Jordan.
How do you break the circle of failure?
The first thing to do is to accept the main reason why you are failing. It’s not the teacher or your friend that keeps talking to you in class. It’s not the environment you grow up in nor is it that you are unlucky. These are excuses and collectively are only 10% of the situation. The reason is YOU.
Once you accept this you can move forward.
Some of the individuals I have worked with come from the most disturbing backgrounds. Broken families, parents in prison, addicts to alcohol and drugs, jobless and spending a life on benefits. Their friends and family all doing the same. Hardly the most inspirational of surroundings for a young person to grow up in, so it’s no surprise that they themselves turn to crime. Monkey see, monkey do.
By encouraging these teenagers to speak what they really think about their lives and their future, rather than what they think you want to hear, you affect their confidence levels. This in turn effects their own self belief, the key player in whether they will or won’t break the circle of failure and go on to do something positive with their life.
94% of the students I worked with from these backgrounds achieved five A*-C grade passes, something classed as ‘impossible’ when we began working together. 74% of them achieved five A*-C grade passes including English and Maths. 62% gained A*-C grade passes in every exam they sat (that’s 14 exams for some of them).
Receiving phone calls from these students expressing their joy on GCSE results day beats any radio award I’ve ever won for myself.
Who knows what they’ll go on to achieve next!